My Christ, My Lord. Today you set aside all heavenly privilege, all glory and honor emphatically owed to you, and willingly laid down your life for all mankind. It's almost impossible even for the most committed disciple to truly fathom the extent of your sacrifice.
The old testament is riddled with line after line, page after page, book after book, all with the same repetitive pattern. God seeks his creations, gives man a path in which to make communion possible, and mankind finds themselves incapable of following through. They stray, fall away; God is angered, disciplines them; they cry out forgive and he is quick to humble his heart and extent forgiveness. He is a lovesick God who is holy; his creations sinful by nature and unworthy of his presence. He could have cast aside all humanity with but a breath and created something else in its place, something more worthy of fellowship with the uncreated God than we could ever be. But he didn't.
Around God's throne is unceasing adoration, day and night. He has legions of angels, living creatures who gladly and wholeheartedly give him the praise and worship he deserves.
Why does he need us?
Why does he want us?
I think about the times in my life when I've felt love most intensely. I think about the conditions that were required, I think about the rarity of it, and of how fleeting it was each time. With that in mind, I try to fathom how much love it would take for me to love the way God does. He doesn't just love me, he loves everyone. Rapists. Murderers. Adulterers. Pedophiles. Hypocrites. Mothers. Fathers. Babies. It makes no difference. His love for them is the same. His desire to be with each of his creations is the same. Regardless of what they say. Regardless of what they do.
How contingent our love is on the right circumstances and the right reciprocation. How stingy we are with who we will love, who we will like, who we will tolerate.
Since I have felt a deeper sense of his love for me, I can only begin to unveil the endless layers of emotion he feels for me. It satisfies the cry of my heart and the deepest aching in my soul like nothing else I've ever experienced. It makes me feel like I'm loved, that I'll always have a place where I belong. I can begin to understand why God would create us with free will on the chance that we might turn against him, that we did turn against him; because when we choose him of our own free will out of our weakness and brokenness, it makes the love he receives from us all the sweeter.
Thank you that you are a jealous God. Thank you that you came after me from the pit of my own man made hell, and pulled me out. Not only did you pull me out, but you didn't scold me or slap me on the wrist or put me in the corner with the dunce cap on, you poured your love out all over me in response to my weak reachings toward you. Holy, holy, holy is the Lord God Almighty, who was and is and is to come! Worthy is the lamb who was slain, worthy is the lion of the tribe of Judah.
